Feeling Like Killing Yourself? Please, Please Read This First.

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First, Breathe.

And read this small note on real life.

Believe it or not, everyone else, just like you are living real lives that are tough, monotonous and boring AF. The duality of terror and love lends life its gravity. Ask yourself your single most pain point right now? Are you living in an imagined reality?

Everything will eventually be OK, because we’ve been given a great gift of memory. We hardly remember anything lovely that’s happened to us let alone anything terrible that has befallen us.

Real life is tender and beautiful. If you want to keep it that way, you have to carefully cultivate and craft it. Its your responsibility, not anyone else’s duty to care for you. Its upto us to be resilient and compassionate towards ourselves to pick up and move on always.

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If you’re depressed, you’re living in the past. If you’re anxious, you’re living in the future. If you’re at peace, you’re living in the present. – Lao Tzu.

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How to continue living when you feel suicidal.

* First. Don’t despair when your phone dies. People have lived for 70,000 years before the damn smart phones became mainstream around 2007.
* Second. Don’t die every time you see a great video or a sick dress. Do you know when people die? When they outlive their children. Don’t trivialize death.
* Train yourself to think of what problems you have and to separate those that you really have control over and those that you don’t have absolutely no control over.
* Go to the sauna. Heat makes the brain release Endorphins to numb the pain of “suffering”. Its how you can get high, naturally.
* If anyone has violated you, its they who has to die. Of shame. Not you. Duh.
* Again, if someone has taken a video of you in your most private moments, he’s the one who should die for his actions.
* Broaden your horizons. Remember if science is a necessity, arts are entertainment.
* Don’t just pop pills for your “depression” and “anxiety” diagnosis. Ask how will medicines cure the pain in the brain.
* Meet your triggers head on. What is it? Hatred, bullying, jealousy, death of a loved one?
* Atleast once a day, ask someone, “How are you?” and mean it.
* Look into people’s eyes when you speak, you might see cries for help. You’re not the only one in pain.
* Touch is anthropological. It comes to the rescue when you can’t see visible signs of trauma.
* Atleast once a week, tell someone, “I need help.”
* You are what you eat. Junk food has the four letter word Junk in it. Duh.
* Be mindful: You only have this moment right now.
* Flourish, thrive and prosper on a positive purpose of the mind.
* Breathe, smile, throb. Its the celebration of being alive.
* Cull your emotions, but cultivate your thoughts.
* Thoughts are powerful. Go back to your childhood home and your favorite toy and you can get there in less than a nano second.
* Practice gratitude for the things you have. Subtract what you already have and you’ll be amazed to see the richness of your life.
* You’ve a choice to leave anything that doesn’t give you joy. Even the feeling of hopelessness and being lonely. They really suck.
* Problems never go away, they only build up. But, so does your ability to face them.
* So what if life wants to overwhelm you? Surrender to it with grace. Not timidity. Soak in everything.
* Experience failure. Train yourself to not repeat those mistakes.
* Do you want freedom? F*** what anybody else thinks. Charge on.
* You alone can infuse meaning into your life. Search for what’s larger than yourself.
* There are many ways to get attention. Start by asking what the bigger picture looks like.
* Don’t let anyone or you set unachievable standards for you. Just take a cue from politicians.

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Martin Seligman, the father of positive psychology says that we go into victim mode after a personal tragedy. Here’s how.

a. We PERSONALIZE it, even though we are not necessarily to blame for it.
b. It’s PERVASIVE in all areas of our life, and we can’t not think of it all the time.
c. And we feel it’s PERMANENT, although nothing in life really is.
* Time is all you have, to make that one shot, to make it all better, to achieve your dreams and to move away from all the pain. Don’t take that one thing away from yourself.

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Serenity Prayer says: ‘God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.’

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Reach out:

Ask for help. Because that is the single most important thing you will do in your life that might mean life or death. Tell your parents how you feel. They have a right to know.

If you’re in the United States, call the national crisis hotline to talk to someone: 1-800-273-TALK.

Adam Maier-Clayton, a Right to die activist from Canada recently committed suicide. He was fighting the legislation to allow mentally ill people to die with dignity. He was finally compelled to kill himself because of chronic unbearable pain and because he couldn’t wait long enough to change the thoughts of law makers. When you see his Twitter profile, you realize how he would reach out to people when he felt lonely.

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“Can’t sleep due to pain. Anyone want to talk on audio for a few?”

“Anyone want to Skype for 5min? I’ve barely spoken to anybody all day due to pain.”

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Still not convinced you can survive this terrible life?

Do me a favor and ask your mom to put a bullet in her head before you do yourself harm. No matter what your mom is, an angel or a monster, she will not survive outliving her child. End it for her before you end it all for yourself. Because her heart will tighten in one fraction of a second and explode in the next. You’ll be gone forever and she will have to live with that. Don’t leave her with that unbearable burden of your loss. Note, no note, there’s no solace.

Not survived by your mother? Here’s a harsh reality for you. The world won’t stop spinning because you’re feeling terrible. Its upto you to seek help and pull yourself together. Life is beautiful. Cheer up. Be a part of this celebration of being alive.

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Questions, just ask!

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